Mikaela and Lee came to me in the hope that they could avoid the same things happening for their upcoming birth as they had experienced in their previous induced labour and birth with their first baby two years before. It’s fair to say that they felt a little sceptical at how hypnobirthing could help after their first induced labour was so long (8 days in hospital), and they had experienced almost every intervention possible, resulting in them describing their first birth as “traumatising”.
Read more: Baby F (Positive induction)I have to say, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a pregnant mum put so much effort into changing their mindset as much as Mikaela, and despite leaving my course being adamant that they would never even consider an induction again, they actually did accept an induction after a few health concerns, and after using their amazing fact-finding skills to work out the best course of action, they trusted their instincts and worked beautifully together as a team to bring their baby into the world!
Mikaela even felt so empowered after this birth that she walked herself, while wheeling her baby in the cot to the postnatal ward a few hours after giving birth and wrote her birth story down once she settled in the ward!
“My birth story began at 36 weeks when I was collecting a gift card for my mum on Mother’s Day and I felt a pop and gush, a feeling of excitement as I presumed my waters had broken. I got into my car and felt between my legs to find my hands full of blood. I took some deep breaths and tried to remain calm whilst I rang maternity triage for advice – they advised that I go to triage at the hospital for further checks and advice. I went to the hospital and was checked over – I was tested for the release of my waters, this came back positive. I filled with excitement. My waters had burst by themselves this time around, and I was ready to use the techniques I’d learnt from hypnobirthing and pregnancy yoga to deliver my baby. I was admitted into hospital on Mother’s Day weekend and I began using the things I had learnt, by bouncing on my ball to push my babies head down towards my cervix whilst listening to positive affirmations on my phone. The next day I was assessed and it was brought to my attention that my waters may not have actually broken. I had another test which confirmed that this was the case. The bleeding was put down to, ‘one of those things’ which happens sometimes during pregnancy. So I went home feeling deflated but ready to continue trying to induce my labour naturally by bathing in clary sage, diffusing lavender and eating dates.
At 38 weeks pregnant I had felt episodes of reduced movement from my baby which worried me not only for the health of my baby but also because I knew that I would be offered an induction like I was with my first pregnancy, and this was not the route that we wanted to pursue. My community midwife sent me up to triage on Friday 11th of April where I was monitored and had discussions with a consultant. I did not want an induction. However, after speaking with the consultant and learning about the risks and the factors that involved reduced foetal movement more clearly we had decided to book the induction for Tuesday 15th of April after realising that we can stop the induction at any point and request a c section. In all honesty, I had the intention of thinking about this over the weekend and concluded that I would call and cancel the induction and book a planned caesarean instead.
However, this wasn’t what we chose to do. I had discussed it with my husband in great detail and decided that we would draw upon our traumatic experience from our first birth and decide on what we felt we could do regarding the induction. We decided that we were prepared to insert a pessary and two gels if necessary, and if I didn’t dilate or contract after that we would opt for the c section.
Tuesday 15th of April arrived. I was nervous. I cried in the car. I was really unsure whether we were making the right choice about our birth. I responded by listening to guided relaxation and practised my breathing and ‘being calm’ (I know, I practiced being calm – I thought I was weird too) but it worked. We went for a lovely breakfast at the café first, and then we were ready to begin.
We got to the hospital at 11am where we were taken to our own room on a ward. We waited here until about 2pm watching hairspray the musical to keeps things light hearted. They moved us into a bay, and at 3pm the pessary went it. The midwife said that my cervix was soft and said that this was promising. I beamed with positivity, with bouncing on my ball, listening to my affirmations and watching MAFS. The morning arrived and we were greeted with a request to move to the labour ward as there was works being completed on this current ward. We agreed excitedly, wondering if would we get our own room this time and try to have an oxytocin party to get things moving along. We went into a shared room with another lady who had her pessary at the same time as me. Moving to the delivery suite had scared me a little as we could hear other labouring women and I wondered whether our birth would be traumatising like before. I recognised my feeling and distracted myself by asking Lee to massage me, hug me and just gently stroke my hair which calmed me down.
In the afternoon on Wednesday the lady opposite me started labouring, and I wished it was me. But I wished her luck! She moved rooms and had her baby arrived moments later which gave me hope. Something I hadn’t felt before considering induction. It got to the 24 hour mark and I was assessed by a midwife who had said that my pessary had fallen out and that I was 1cm dilated. I tried to remain positive and reminded myself of our plan. The pessary had fallen out but I had two gels left to try. The gel was inserted into my cervix. I started to feel stomach pains and was convinced that it was working. Now that we had the room to ourselves, Lee had turned all of the lights out, put out our battery tea lights, sprayed lavender and found me a birthing ball to sit on for the rest of the afternoon. I was examined again 6 hours later and I was still 1cm dilated, another gel was inserted. My next examination was due at 4am, but at 1.20am I lay down to rest and *pop* my waters had broken, I had done it all by myself!
I was so excited ready to give birth, but was unsure on what our journey now looked like if I didn’t contract and dilate enough. Nevertheless, we were moved into our own private room finally. Lee made an oxytocin party again, and we put on Michael McIntyres Big Show – the contractions started and we were left alone with gas and air to party the baby out.
A few hours later the midwife came back to examine me – she said that I was 2cm dilated and that not all of my membranes had gone and asked for my consent to release the rest. I gave my consent – we had been partying for hours and I was ready to start contracting and birth my baby. We were left alone again, but the midwife returned and asked if I needed an epidural and suggested that I would probably need to go onto the drip as I wasn’t contracting as much as I should be by now.
Oh shit. This was our boundary. This is where we said we would stop to prevent what happened before, and yet I was faced with this choice again.
I decided that I wanted an epidural regardless, as I would need one for the section anyway, and the contractions I was having were feeling intense. We had the epidural, and I felt more relaxed and calm ready to make another decision. Lee and I discussed it together and decided to continue with the induction on the drip. If it was too intense like before, we would stop the induction and opt for the section. So we continued. This time I felt different, I was in my cosy room watching Michael McIntyre by candlelight. I could still feel the contractions slightly with my epidural which I liked as I felt in control of my body rather than blocked completely from it.
6 hours went by, I slept and rested knowing that I may need to save my energy to push. Another midwife examined me… I was 3cm dilated. Now was the time to decide whether we continued or whether we opted out like we had planned long before, and have the section. Lee reminded me of how much I wanted a vaginal birth and that I was safe, that it wasn’t going to be like last time. But of course, he said he would respect my decision if I wanted the section. I was feeling the pressure, did I continue or did I not? Many risks and benefits to both choices… I wasn’t sure. So I took my time and came up with a solution – could we continue for another 4 hours on a higher dose of the synthetic oxytocin, and if this didn’t work then we would have the section. We continued. As we neared 5pm I felt nervous, I knew this would be it and I would be going into surgery but I kept telling myself that my baby would be here soon no matter what the outcome was.
And then I felt pressure… it was 4.30pm and I wasn’t sure my epidural was working. The midwife checked me and gave me gas and air should I need to use it. The pressure was there and it felt different… I felt that … I needed a poo….
I asked the midwife to assess me early, and I tried not to get too excited as I had prepared myself for every possible outcome and I was ok with that; my baby would be here, and we would both be safe in the right place. I was fully dilated …. Time to start pushing. I pushed and breathed – with the support of my husband and the midwife. The midwife had a projector for twinkly lights (ours broke so had collected her own from her bag and she made the room cosy whilst I was focusing on my breathing) and Lee played our wedding song on repeat and held my hand. It was dark, close and intimate… not like our experience before.
At 5.25pm our beautiful daughter was born and I couldn’t believe it….. I couldn’t believe that I had actually done it. We had skin to skin immediately whilst I birthed my placenta. She started sucking at my breasts and fed for 20 minutes. Her observations were perfect and she weighed 7.lb 11oz.
We were told we would be moved to a ward, and with this information my legs were tested and my epidural removed. I got up and I dressed my daughter in her first baby grow and pushed her cot through the hospital onto the ward like the absolute wonder woman I am. It felt so empowering. So different to our previous experience where I was pushed on a bed onto the ward and developed infections that needed to be treated immediately. I
will be forever grateful that I remember my birth, the skin to skin contact, and those moment with my husband because this isn’t something I had with my first child and it was truly magical.